Thru the looking glass - backwards

Sometimes the things you need to say to someone are the very things that you can't. It's like trying to follow Alice through the mirror, but tripping and falling backwards into that topsy-turvy world. What "should be" isn't and what "can't be" exists. A whole encyclopedia of words at my fingertips but somehow I can't seem to put the right ones together, so the words go unspoken. Feelings become "fine". Thoughts melt into "I don't know" or "I guess". Up is down. Wrong is right. Simple sentences become some unpronounceable foreign language and I end up screaming "GO AWAY!" when what I want to whisper is "listen"